i used to be bi. However, my first relationship with a boy, which started last year was really bad. the sex was horrible and often painful. He never really enjoyed my body, he wouldnt really even tough me during the act of sex. I was horribly controlled as well. In the end, it ended in a sexual assault while i was unconscious from an asthma attack. I dont mean to condemn all men for his actions, I dont think that all men are bad. However, i must confess that after everything that happened, i am simply terrified of men. When a guy tries to kiss me or when i listen to men talk about women, unfairly, Im frankly disgusted with them. I cant help it, i'm in therapy but I just cant. Ive always been bi, but now im only comfortable with a woman, even if i have an argument or things in a relationship with a girl arent easy either, i still feel safer. I dont know how to tell my family or to explain.
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